Have you ever played Awkward Family Photos? It is a hilarious game that my family loves to play when we get together. Well, this would be my version of one of the photos. I’m not exactly sure why but Micah refused to sit on the swing with his cousins so he sat in the grass and pouted. And being the absolutely gracious mom that I am I just had to document it 😉

We are doing well. Bry had a bout of strep over the weekend (!!!) but thank the Lord no one else seems to have picked it up. Phew!
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(We really are doing well. I wrote this and last weeks blog several weeks ago but it did not seem appropriate to post them until after my father-in-law had passed away. I know there are rough times ahead but for now we are doing well)

Over the last few mos many tears have been shed, and as those of you know who have gone through this before, we are probably not done. But I was amazed one Sunday morning while at church singing worship to God. Inside my heart just ached but I raised my hands and sang praise to God acknowledging His goodness and faithfulness.

You have to understand the hurt never went away but instead it turned sweet. I can’t think of any other way to say this but there was a sweetness to the pain bc I finally felt for a moment a taste of what the Psalmist might have felt when he wrote “God is near to the broken hearted.”

I knew God was there and was holding me but even greater, I knew God was there worthy of worship and on His throne and in complete control. And the pain seemed only to heighten the awareness of God and His authority. And the tears fell again but not bc of the pain I still felt, but bc of the sweetness of knowing God was still God even in the midst of my pain.

I can’t describe it any better, I wish I could! But I’m sure many have similar stories of moments where the heart has been completely broken and yet the awesome-ness of God has so overwhelmed you that for that one moment you would gladly go through that broken feeing forever IF it also meant you would see and know God like this as well.

I am guessing that those who are suffering greatly whether through persecution for Christ or simply horrible afflictions bc we live in a broken world must experience the presence of God like this far more strongly than I can even imagine.

And I can now personally testify that the presence of God is so sweet and made even my broken heart sweet.

I do not desire to see any of us go through pain. Nor do I desire to see my own children struggle. But the taste I had of the presence of God was so sweet it left me longing for more. More for myself, my family, and my church. So I will speak over us the blessing that God will break each one of us and our families. That we would each experience the pain of brokenness in order that we may better know the sweetness of the presence of our God.