I love to teach. Getting up in front of people and sharing what God has taught me fills me up. It invigorates me and gets me passionate. I love it!
I am not in a season where I get to teach a lot. At least not in the ways I want.
I know, some of you are horrified 🙂 Don’t worry, this isn’t a homeschool plug.
Right now the main things I’m teaching are – math, reading, writing, and spelling, how to ride a bike, go potty on the toilet, eat new foods, play with friends, treat your siblings… with Biblical ideas scattered throughout the day when the Holy Spirit reminds my tired brain to say something.
Needless to say teaching these things do not invigorate me. Watching my children try and fail, try and succeed only to try and fail again can frustrate me and make me feel like an absolute failure. When I get up in front of people they see only what I allow them to see. Everyone enjoys being told “good job, wow God really spoke through you!” and I am no different. My kids see me all the time. The good, the bad, and the ugly. They don’t often say “wow, mom, that math lesson was amazing!” (ok they have NEVER said that) Or even, “you are a great teacher! Thanks for taking the time to teach us that! I will use it forever!” (yeah, never heard that one either)
It doesn’t feel as good to teach my kids. In fact, some days they don’t seem to appreciate my efforts!
I want to teach the Bible. I want to share with others how amazing the Word of God is! But what if I get so busy teaching others about God’s Word that I forget to teach my kids? What if I travel the globe and teach to thousands but never show the depth, the beauty, or the richness of the Bible to my own children?
I am with my kids a lot. They see me mess up and then get to hear me apologize again and again. They watch as I interact with Bryan and the people at the grocery store. They’re listening as I talk on the phone or reciting Scripture. They are learning from me far more than I realize. Am I using the time wisely? Or am I wasting my time wishing I could teach someone.
My mom has reminded me many times “my kids are my mission field. They are my priority right now, not ‘the world.'” And, honestly, I don’t want to miss this time. I know it will be gone all too soon. But too often I loose sight of that fact.
“Lord God, let me make the most of this season. Let me use every opportunity to show my kids how amazing You and Your Word are. I don’t want to look back and see the many I taught but realize I missed the ones that are most important to me. I have dedicated each child to You. Let me be faithful to the task You’ve given and raise up these children to love You and Your Word. Let me teach my kids about You. Grant me wisdom, perseverance, and patience. And may each child bring You much glory.”